Yea, i left it all behind me; the drugs, the random acts of violence. i came home to LA and started to rebuild the mess that had become my life. i left hoping to never fully return to that place that took me to the brink of disaster and back. i have been changed; i believe its too soon to tell if it was a positive change. or maybe i know that it wasnt and feigning hope might someday make it truth. on more optimistic days, it seems, Truth is what Chico gave me. Take away the anti-depressants and prescription sleeping aids and truth turns to dust in my hands.

After my eminent return home i spent many days reflecting on the events that took place, and many of my nights reliving those days in vivid dreams. i have woken up frantically searching my wrists for bruises the cuffs brought, only to realize those bruises have long been faded. if my short sentence in this Asylum could send cracks rippling through my life, what will be of the friends i left some 3 years ago. be it fate or the unjust hand of the devil, my journey through this valley of carnage is not complete. A second sentence has been added, a possibility of 3 more years to be served. I may not be innocent but i bear the Truth as i know it, and as it has been told to me in 1st hand accounts.

After dealing with the emotional and mental roller coaster that ascended upon me when i first heard the news, i chose to stand and to fight. i cannot change the past, and i cannot save this place. i can only try to stay true and sane, carefully stepping around the anonymous ruins of others. I have chosen this path, will i waver? yes. will i try other methods, of course, but this i know will be the path of grace. to keep me out of the cobwebs i will purge the criminal, the disgust, the chaos and the hate.